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Kirschner says that women prefer their men to make eye contact with them as they're talking. This is something that women are often quite up front about. If she's ready and she's given you time, the next time the subject comes up, be prepared to step up or step off.
And looking her in the eye during sex will deepen the relationship outside the bedroom. Romance is something she will always want, whether you've been together two months or 20 years.
Women do like to talk to about what's going on in the sack, and they want to please their man -- and a tactful approach is often best. Be sure to ask for what you want in a positive and validating way.
Kirschner advises saying something along the lines of, "I would really love if you [fill in the blanks]." When you have an off night and can't perform, she feels bad, too.
If she tells you that she is upset because her boss gave her a tough time, she wants to hear you say, "I'm sorry that work was such a drag for you today." And remember: Resist the urge to offer solutions.
The three dates before sex rule is an urban legend.
A good rule of thumb is to give the relationship at least two months to grow before entering the sexual arena. "They want to feel connected and understood, they want to be romanced." That means time and talking and touching -- in other words, foreplay.
When she's wearing a sexy new dress, for example, she'll give you major points for saying how hot she looks, especially if you mention the dress before she does.Flowers, an intimate dinner, a few lines of love poetry -- don't worry, they don't have to be your own -- might sound cliché, but Kirschner insists that most women appreciate such simple romantic gestures and often show their appreciation after the lights go down.IMAGES PROVIDED BY: 1) James Randklev/Photographer's Choice 2) Richard Upshur/Flickr 3) Blaise Hayward/Photodisc 4) Monalyn Gracia/Corbis 5) Peter Augustin/Lifesize 6) Zave Smith/Uppercut Images 7) Romilly Locker/The Image Bank 8) Jose Luis Pelaez/Blend Images 9) Willie B."If she likes a guy in tight jeans, you wear tight jeans." OK, this tip doesn't come from women, but from clever testing by psychologists of women's subconscious preferences. "Women love personal growth, they love a man who is thoughtful and sensitive." She likes it when her man recognizes a flaw -- a short temper, for example, or a regularly sullen mood after work -- and loves it when he makes an effort to address it.
One intriguing study found that the color red made men seem more powerful, attractive, and sexually desirable to women. When something's bothering her, she wants your ear, not your advice.Thomas/Vetta 10) Tom Merton/OJO 11) Lauri Rotko/Gorilla Creative Images 12) Frank Herholdt/Stone 13) Henrik Sorensen/Riser 14) Jupiterimages/Botanica 15) Jochen Sand/Photodisc 16) Laurent Delhourme/Taxi 17) Ryan Mc Vay/Photodisc 18) John Slater/Stock Image 19) Kris Timken/Blend Images REFERENCES: Diana Kirschner, Ph D. It is intended for general informational purposes only and does not address individual circumstances.